WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Makin my Crismoss Cards

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: Yes, we got a nil-nil dror wiv Bradford. (That's a not-a-looz)
  • Simpsons: YES!!! YES!! I akchewly sor The Simpsons! Woohoo!!
  • Tesco: Sadly not. I think I mite hide Daddy's Weetabix, then weel hav to go. He carnt liv withowt Weetabix.
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10 /10 -got Mummy in the bath. Hers, not mine, ov corse. Don't worry I cuverd my eyes. Enyway thare wer lots ov bubbles.
  • Overall Score: 8ish/10

I deesydid to hav a paw at maykin my own Crismoss cards to send to my frends. Mummy gayve me a bit ov lino, wun ov the bits we bort in Lundon wen we met up wiv Beanie the uther month. I've never dun lino cuttin befor, hav yu? Heer is how yu do it-

Ferst yu dror a pikcher ov three hansum Bears.

Now, yu need to get this pikcher on the lino BAK-TO-FRONT so that it comes owt the rite way wen yu print it. So yu hav to scribble all over the pikcher wiv pencil, wich seems like sakrilidge, but fear not, gentle artist....

Then yu rub the pikcher onto the lino by tracing throo on the bak. Oh look! Thare's me, bak-to-front! Yu can tell, from my ears!
Then yu get a bluddy stupid blitherin thing speshol cutter and cut cut cut all the bits ov lino that won't be lines in yor pikcher. This is kwite hard.
This nex bit waz my fayvrit. Yu skwirt paint on sumthing smooth, then spred it owt wiv a rolly thing calld a brayer. I choze sum brown paynt. It waz like playin wiv meltid choklit.
Next yu yewz the brayer to roll sum paynt onto the lino, an gently put the lino down onto sum payper. Then yu get yor Mummy to peel the lino off gently, and... tah dah!!
He he he! Look! It's me, Sam an Blooberry!!!
Do yu think it's a good likeness? Weer the Three Wise Bears!
Then I choze lots ov diffrent cullerd paypers from Mummy's stash, an mayde all my masterpeeces pikchers into cards-I mayde 15. I carnt find eny envelopes to fit, so I shall hav to mayke thoze too.

As to hoo I send them to, well, if I sent yu wun larst yeer, I shud still hav yor address so I can send yu wun ov theez. If yu've never told me ware yu liv but wud like a card, emayle me yor address an I'll send yu wun!



Denise said...

Weetabix? Did someone say Weetabix? I love Weetabix!!! Had some for breakfast this morning. Love the way you made your cards, you're so clever and they looked fun to make.

Two French Bulldogs said...

you sure a busy bear
Benny & Lily

Jerry and Ben said...

Beary beautiful cards Bob! We're helping to make Christmas cookies next weekend!

Di said...

Brilliant Bob! All that cutting looks like hard work to me but worth it in the end. Three Wise Bears - snort, snort - perfect! Di xx

Shrinky said...

You've obviously inherited your mummy's wonderful creativity, aren't these cards wonderful? I would be PROUD to display one of those, who wouldn't be? Maybe if you email me your address, we could swap cards this year?

Shrinky said...

ps. Windows Live Mail hates me, I'll leave my email here, and send my addy on once you get back to me!



Found art blog said...

I love your cards!! They're brilliant!!! Maybe you could get Mum to type that pome out and print it off a few times??

Sullivan McPig said...

Oh! Those are great!!
My owner told me she made a lino stamp out of floor-lino when she was a kid. It wasn't a picture of a pig though.

Lynda (Granny K) said...

WoHHH! Bob I'm well impressed wiv yor artwork! Tis Brillyant! I can tell it's you as well.
I had Weetabix this mornin' wiv stewed apples on. (We had to do sumfin wiv orl those apples we got off Chris's tree, so we are eatin' stewed apples a lot).
PS I hope you've still got my address. hint. hint. :o)
PPS I've got yors! :o)

Asta said...

My Dawling Bob
1I soooo apologze fow neglecting you, my beloved fwiend (blush,blush) this moving stuff is way complicated what wif twenty thousand calls to embassies and consoolates and packing companies and shippews and twying to sell my piano(boooooo hoooooo hooooo) and twying to get some gween papews togethew to pay fow it all, whewh..I'm exhaustewed just thinking about it all..mommi is going cwazy and altewnating between excitement and sadness and teawing hew haiws out. BUT!!! hewe's the gweat pawt! I will be living closew to you and maybe , just maybe, I'll get to meet you paw to paw some day, of couwse in the meantimes, I will still blog (just as soon as the cwaziness subsides, which might take a jillion yeaws at the wate we'we going).You will aways be my soopew loved fwiend and that will nevew change, no mattew whewe i live.
I'm sposed to go on the big plane wif Mommi and Daddi..(i hope up fwont) we awe pwobably going about Janooawy 15th..if youw gwammpawents awe thewe then, they should tell us on the peemail(I don't have a phone fow thewe yet) but we will have skypi thingie that will help us call and oh, my, so much to do ..Mommi thanks you fow those nose huggies fow hew biwfday.

and Bob

that Chwissmuss cawd of you and the othew thwee wise beaws is Pawvfect!!!!
I think evewyone will be thwilled to get one..it's bootiful.
I won't be sending cawds ow getting pwezzies ow anything this yeaw, but I hope you'll know that I'm sending all of you my bestest love and good wishes anyway and will waise my glass to youw health on chwissmuss
smoochie kisses aways

Buttons the Bear said...

Love your cards! They turned out beautiful! A perfect likeness to yourself, I recognized you right off.

Feronia said...

That is so brilliant, Bob! I love lino cuts! Woolley B. Bear and I would love a card too, please <3

BumbleVee said...

ohhhh...what a lot of cutting ..... with the uhm... bloodystupidthingymebob...hey.... your name is in there!
anyway...I probably would have cut off my fingers or sumthin' stoopid..... ....best I stick to smaller sharp things...like needles.... but, you guys did a great job!!

Hammie Hamster said...

We have all the things for Lino printing here in G.'s workroom for months, but we didn't find the time to do something with them! Now you really inspired us to take all the things, whipe of the dust and start making prints too!!!!!

Blog Princess G said...

Bob! My teddies and I have so missed your blog since we got our new computer and we found it again tonight, hooray!

Glad to know you are doing well - I had no idea you were such an artist.

Yours hunnily... BPG

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
CherryPie said...

Wow! they look fantastic. I am sure all your friends will feel very special when they receive one of these through the post :-)

Julie said...

I fink you are weely cleva to mayke such portwaity crismoss cards speshly when you have to use daynjerus cutty things.

Thank you for vizitin my blog. Can you pleez tell Dilly thank you for her luvly parsel. I sent her an email so I hope she got it. x

Lynda (Granny K) said...

Oh wow! Thank you for the superduper hand-made Chrismus card Bob! it's very special and I shall keep it. (I posted yors today!) xx

Shrinky said...

Ooooh, oooh, ooooooooooh!!! Guess what I got today? Whoo-hoo, one of the ferries must've got through, 'cos the postie-man has brought me your special card to my door (see my big, cheesy happy face?) Aw Bob, it's proper luverly, so's it is, thank you so much - I've given it pride of place on my mantlepiece. ((x))

Anonymous said...

Brilliant card! The 3 Wise Bears is an excellent choice of characters. Lino prints are fun to make...the cutting can be a little difficult.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Teehee! I'm thrilld yu awl liket it so mutch. I mayde a 2nd batch too an sent lots. I still hav a few, so it issent too layte, if enywun wud still ike wun. An I'm keepin the lino cut in cayse sumwun wants wun layter. Jus let me noe!