I liket this week. Grannys ar fun.

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No- but pleez ware yor bloo pants today cos we ar playin in a cup gayme!!! (hed or bottom; duzzent matter wareyu ware them.)
  
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: no, but we hav gon lots this week tho
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: I rekkon I cud hav got a 10 off Granny but Mummy sed I mussent mayke her jump rite now. Perhaps it's cos sheez small. All Grannys ar small, but wen my Granny sits on the sofa her legs don't reech the flor. In fakt, they don't eevn dangol proply theyer not long enuff. Enyway if I mayde her jump she mite fall off it. /10
• Overall Score: 7.600001/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

It's ok me an Henry mayde up. But not in a sissy way. We shook pors an did a manly thump on eech uther's showlders. On condishun that I can larf an giv him a shuv wen France gets beeten by North Korea so they won't get the Werld Cup enyway haha.

*** *** *** *** ***

An THANK YU THANK YU THANK YU evrywun hoo took part in Dilly's poll an votid NO to her proposal that I be cuverd in catnip. We wun! BEAR POWER!!!! Hurrayy!!!

Hehehehe!

*** *** *** *** ***

Well layter today we ar off to tayke Granny bak home. I shall miss her. Sheez funny. She nods off in the middol ov CSI like Daddy duzz, but the diffrence is she waykes up evry 8 minits wiv a littol snorty snor, wharaz Daddy jus sleeps throo to the middol ov the next episode an then arsks wat happend to the man in the car (wat car? "The wun that waz shot at." Wat car? "Yeah, at the beginnin." No, that waz the larst wun, Daddy. "Wazit? Hav I bin asleep?...") Yu mite like CSI or yu mite not, but I bet yu dident think yu cud hert yor beads larfin at it, did yu? But between them I cud bearly hold in my seams I waz gigglin so mutch.

Mr Scooter an Miss Fluffy ar goin home too. They originerly wer goin to stay heer but Granny will miss them too mutch so they ar goin home. Nuffin to do wiv bein scaired ov bein cuverd wiv catnip, ok? I'm brayve.

Not that bein scaired means yor not brayve. If yu wernt scaired yu wuddent kno yu wer bein brayve, wud yu? An yu wuddent NEED to be brayve if yu wernt scaired. I'm jus not, that's all.

(Not scaired. I don't mean not brayve. Cos I am.)

WAR!!!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: serspendid
• Overall Score: huh! /10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

Big thanks to evrywun hoo haz allreddy nipt over to Dilly's blog to try to foyle her inikwitiss plans to cuver me in catnip. If yu havent allreddy votid AGENST this dragonish skeem, PLEEZ go an vote NO- kwik!!!!!

An meenwile, as tho I dident hav enuff to worry abowt wiv the prospekt ov bein torn furry lim from furry lim, I hav had to sort owt my cuzzin, Henry, as well.

The mor observant amung yu will allreddy hav tayken note that my nose is ov an Irish kaliber. The trainee spys amung yu mite also hav notist that Henry's is French. Well, if yu hav herd enything abowt World Cup Football this week, yu mite be reddy for wat I'm abowt to tell yu: he an I hav fallen owt. An that's the nice, gerly way ov puttin it, wich I, natchrelly, wuddent put at all, but Mummy is helpin me wiv sum ov this typin so I hav to hewmer her.

On Wendzday nite, Ireland waz winnin. We wer! We wer! It waz grayte! But then the French Captin, Thierry Henry, CHEETID an yewzd his HAND on the ball an got a goal an then France won. In fakt he dident jus nok the ball wiv his hand wunce, he did it TWICE! An then arfterwoods he sed, oh well, it's up to the ref to say if it's rong. WHAT???? No it's snot, yu cheet! It's up to yu to play proply!

Snot fair!

My cuzzin is eevn naymed arfter this player an yu wud think that he wud be, oh I don't kno, lyin low, tip-toe-in rownd me, offerin to be my slayve, stuff like that. But oh no! Heez bin rubbin it in!!!

So I had to tayke things in paw...

OOOOOF!!! Tayke that, yu frog eetin cheetin garlik muncher!
AAAAARRGHHH!!!!!
The cheeter got me!
PHWARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!
Tayke that, yu snail licker!

DOOOFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!
Hand ball THAT! HA!
OWWWWWWWFTFTFTFTFTFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OW!! HE BITE ME! HE BITE ME!
KABOOOOM CH CH CH CH!!!!!!!!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!
I waz winnin!
I waz winnin, I tell yer!!!!
I had im just ware I wantid im!
Then Mummy broke us up.
POO.

Now she rekkons we hav to say sorry an shayke pors.
Yeah, rite.

She jus duzzent understand how important football is! Pah! Sheez a gerl!

Scrummy dizzerts.... an HELPPPPP!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons:yes
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 6 (I waz hewmerin Zed) /10
• Overall Score: 7.26115/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

Lots haz been goin on heer at Granny's.

At the weekend, Daddy cayme to vizit. Do yu kno, he went to Football on the way- WIVOWT ME!!!!! Onnistly. I am owt ov his site for wun week an allreddy he is off doing stuff wivowt me. It jus shows yu. I am a much under-apryshyaytid Bear. Sumtimes I find myself wundering if he reelly diserves me.

Enyway.... on SUnday we awl went for a drive. We went down lots ov country laynes to show Granny the larst ov all the ortum leevs. It waz fun an we sor lots ov bunnys.

We stoppt at a crarft sentor an had Sunday Lunch. I waz a very geneross Bear (as is my ilk) an I shared all my dizzerts:

Heer is me sharin my coffee an walnut cayke wiv Daddy:
Heer is me sharin my lemon cheezcayke wiv Granny:
Heer is me sharin my treekol tart wiv Mummy:

See? I's geneross. I's WELL geneross.

This Sunday we ar awl goin bak home! An we ar taykin Granny too! She is coming to stay for a week. We ar also goin to bring the cats to liv wiv us now as they needs lots ov carfterin.
Heer is ware I need yor urgent help!!!! Dilly keeps tryin to put catnip on me!!!!! She is eevn runnin a poll abowt it on her blog. Pleez can yu go an vote "NO"!!! I'm allreddy small an the sayme culler as a mowsie. Mr Scooter an Miss Fluffy don't need eny mor encurridgement!!!!

Bye fer now!

Maykin Granny larf

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons: no, I am tryin to get Granny to watch this but so far she prefers to hav the news on. Weird.
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: I got Dilly. She sed my scor waz 2 but reelly it waz 10. I shud hav known sheed say 2. But I waz desperit an she waz the ownly wun up for a gayme /10
• Overall Score: 7ish/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

I am tryin to mayke Granny smile. She is a bit down cos ov havin been ill. She sez she feels angry at herself for bein ill an is awl annoyd. Mummy is a bit down too, but Daddy is comin to see us today an that will be nice cos he is bringing Grayum an Sam too.

Heer is a joke I told Granny today. Mummy sed I shuddent tell her cos it is rood, but I told her enyway cos I kno that Grannys do like the rood wuns reelly, jus peepol think they don't, but they do. So heer it is. If yu hav a Granny, mayke shor yu tell her this wun. See if she larffs like my Granny did! Mine neerly choket on her tea!

A man walks into a bar wiv a steering wheel between his legs.
The barman sez to him,
"Do yu kno yu hav a steering wheel between yor legs?"
The man sez-
"Yeah, I kno! It's drivin me nuts!"

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh boy I neerly split my beads wen I herd that wun. I carnt wayte to tell Sam!

Then I showd Granny this website: Compare The Meerkat.
Hav a look. Clik on "movies". Thare is wun ov out-takes from the advert the meerkats do on tv. It's well funny.

If yu hav eny jokes I can tell Granny, let me kno! I think she feels better wen sheez larffin!

Bye fer now!

Granny home!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons: No: Granny duzzent seem to watch it!
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: Mummy sez I shuddent play this on Granny wile sheez not well (but I rekkon it wud cheer her up) /10
• Overall Score: 7 (thare waz cayke) /10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

We've fetched Granny home from the hopsikol! She is ok but tyerd. She duzzent reelly remember mutch bowt wat happend to her.

The laydy in the hopsikol sed that Granny haz to put on sum wayte an gayve her a leeflet bowt stuff to eet. Me an Dilly hav been studyin it. It approovs ov biskits an shoogar an things, so I hope we get to stay heer longer as it sownds like it cud be gud!

Daddy is bak home cos he is at werk, but Mummy is heer. She is helpin to carfter Granny an keepin an eye on her in cayse she duzzent feel well. She also is taykin care ov the cats and cookin dinner an stuff like that.

Granny is ok but a bit kwyert. She sez she is angry at herself for gettin ill but I sed, that's silly, it's just yor tern to be carftered, that's all. So put yor feet up an enjoy the cayke!

Peepol keep bringin flowers. It's startin to look like Kew Gardens in heer. Mutch mor vegetayshun an I shall hav an indor loo. HAHAHAHAHA!
Dilly keeps inspektin the flowers in thare varzes. I never knew she waz a flower arrayngin expert but I spoze I shud hav gesst. It's gud reelly as evry now an then she is flarged by all the leevs an for sum blissful moments it's like Dilly is invissibol HAHAHAHA!
Mummy keeps arrayngin the flowers *her* way, an then Dilly keeps taykin all the pink flowers owt an puttin them in a varze on thare own.

Mummy bort sum Chrismoss Mince Pies today. Bit errly, but yu hav to tayste all the possibilitys in time so yu kno wat type to get for Chrismoss, don't yu. Theez wuns hav got brandy an arlmonds in them. I'm abowt to have wun. I shall nuke it in the microwayve ferst an then put a bit ov creem on it. SLURP! I'll do wun for Granny too. Sheel like that.

Bye fer now!

Vizitin Granny in hopsikol

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

Yesterday me and sum ov the Bears from Granny's howse went wiv Daddy to see the football, wile the green types went wiv Mummy bak to the hopsikol to see Granny.

The football was grayte- we won agenst Southend (full nayme, Southend Scum) 3 - 0 wa-hey!!!!

We took Zed as he haddent been befor. Onnistly Zed gets so hyper! He eevn thort goin throo the turn-stile was exsytin stuff an werthy of a kwik darnce!

Arfterwerds we met up wiv Mummy agen. We sat on the chair neer Granny's bed. We arskt if she wud like a Bear to stay wiv her in hopsikol; the laydy in the bed nex to her haz wun. So thare we wer; me, Blooberry Bear, Green Helen Bear and Zed, hoo yu mite remember is perpol. She had a reel good choyse ov cullers! But she just larft an sed no, it's ok.

I waz a littol bit releevd if I'm absolootly onnist (wich I tend to be, as I am an onnist Bear) thare is a strong smell ov sope up thare an a lot ov cleenin an stuff an I mite hav endid up havin to hav a barth an I get enuff ov bein naggd abowt that from Mummy!

Granny issent eetin very mutch. She arskt Mummy to sneek sum ov her supper owt so that her playte wud be empty, but Mummy sed no. I wud hav but she dident arsk me. I told her to hide it in her pajarma pokkits but she sed they dident hav eny. I waz goin to sergest pants next, but dident, cos I wassent shor if she wor eny wiv pajarmas. Now I wish I had arskt as it wud hav been intrestin to find owt. All in the nayme of pant resertch, yu understand.

Today we are taykin a littol cayke wiv us becos it is Mummy's berfday and Mummy is hopin Granny will eet sum ov it. But then if she duzzent that's just all the mor for us issent it so I don't kno wy they ar so worreed abowt it.

By for now!

At Granny's howse, wivowt Granny

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons:yes
• Tesco: yes
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: serspendid for a bit /10
• Overall Score: not too shor/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

I am at Granny's howse! This dongle we got for Daddy's laptop is grayte. Granny issent even on the internet, but the dongle meens we can get online enyware! Wat a grayte gadget for a Spy to hav!

Well things hav tayken a straynge tern this week as my Granny waz tayken to hopsikol.
The doctor thinks she had a mini stroke.

This waz not, as I had ferst thort, sumthing to do wiv maykin a fuss ov a small furry animal. I did wonder. Perhaps she stroked sumthing very small an it terned an bit her? Or maybe she stroked a hedgehog an got hert by the prickols?

But kno, apparently it's not that.

She looks very littol in her big hopsikol bed. I went wiv Mummy and Daddy to see her larst nite. Dilly cayme too but kept maykin a strange growlin noyze at the nerses cos she thinks they shud be waring nersey hats an they don't eny mor. I dident eevn kno that reptillyen types mayde that sort of noyze.

Oh well. I hope she gets better soon. I like Granny. I like her lotzanlotz. Sheez funny. An she always haz grayte biskits an caykes.

Me an Mummy ar goin to stay heer for days now, eevn arfter Granny gets home. I'm a very helpfoll Bear an so I am stayin to help. Besides, the hopsikol is in Gillingham, wer the football is. Hehe!

Will be bak to updayte yu all soon as I can.
Meenwile pleez can yu do a speshol littol frolik for my Granny.

Ahhhh............... Dorothy!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: No
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 1 (Hehe. I let Dorothy win!!) /10
• Overall Score: 9.9/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

Yesterday waz grayte!!!

Me an Daddy went to London an met up wiv my Arnty Anna an her famly. They hav come over to London for a few days. Heer's me, reddy to go. Phytheas's mum mayde me this satchell. It's cool, issent it?We drove harfway to London then got a train to meet Arnty Anna. At ferst we all went to a big park ware we fed skwirrols.

In the park: Arnty Anna wiv my cuzins Kevin an William an Yolanda, hoo is showin Dorothy sumthing up a tree. I think. Unkol Alvaro waz thare too, but he kept owt ov the pikchers becos he is goin bald. Hehee. [Cheeky Bear!]

Thare wer big lakes in the park too, wiv lots ov goosies on them:

Heer's me an Dorothy taykin a ride in my cuzin William's hood.
We had sum grayte chattin wile we wer in thare!

Dorothy told me abowt whare sheez been travlin:
Arfter her stay wiv us in the summer, she went to stay wiv my Arnty Fiona in Edinburgh. She took her all the way to Cornwall on hollyday!

Arfter Arnty Fiona, Dorothy went to stay wiv a laydy hoo werks in the Scottish Parliament. She had fotoes taken on the boss's chair in the parliament bildin! The laydy sneekt in wiv her wen all the uther MP's wer owt!! How's that for a cheeky Bear! Hehe!

Then she went to EuroDisney. She sed she had a grayte time thare but the mice wer very big an a bit scary.

Then she went to Arnty Anna's howse, Ireland. She dident kno that that wud meen coming bak to England an so meetin up wiv me waz a serprize! Hehe! I waz serprized too!!!!

We awl went to the Syence Mewseum. It waz very bizzy cos the children ar all on Harf Term Brake this week. So it waz full ov kiddies an Daddy had to keep remindin himself that he wassent in charge ov them all. The downside ov this waz that he cuddent tell them to be kwyert an sit down an so it got kwite noizy. Me an Dorothy nipt owt to the Mewseum cafe for a snak an a sit down:

Hey! Chek owt Dorothy's eers! Wun forwerd an wun bak! Way to go, Dorothy!!!

Layter we awl went bak to thare hotel.
Heer's Dorothy an me lookin at food menus tryin to desyde wat to hav for supper:

In the end we awl went owt for a Chineez meel an Dorothy an me had a playte ov choklit brownies insted cos I thort the noodels lookt like werms an wunce I told her that she waz put off evrything till I sed wat abowt choklit? See, I kno the way to a gerl Bear's beads.
I had a luvly time. Me an Daddy dident get home till layte layte layte. An then I was up talki bowt it till 1am! I waz so exsytid. It so grayte to see Dorothy agen. Sheez my frend, yu see. I think sheez luvly.

Today I had a nice kwyert day at home. The Windowsill Bears wer down off the windowsill, it bein a T day. It waz a nice day. Ownly I hav a sor bit in my chest today. It feels odd, like I swallowd sumthing big an it broozd me. Maybe it waz sumthing I ate. It gets werse wen I think abowt Dorothy. Issent that odd? Hey ho!

Grayum heer!

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!


Well, that yung Bob is down in London rite now, so I thort I'd nip in heer wile thare's sum peece an kwyert!

I wassent serprized to see that that yung wippersnapper haddent updaytid his blog, or thankt yu for yor messidges- frankly, yung Bears today don't hav a grayte deel ov manners, not like in my day.

He rang me from a hotel to arsk if I cud get his Mummy to record a program on BBC2 at 8 o' clok. It's all abowt a famly ov blak Bears, yu see. Ownly I hope it's not a sad program, like wen they go shootin them. That jus issent fair. How is a Bear ment to hold a gun? Weev got big paws, yu kno. It was hard enuff lernin to hold the cholk, wen I waz a teetcher.

Teecherin waz harder in my day wen yu had to ware a hat an rite wiv cholk. Cholk is wun bad muther for gettin owt ov yor ferr. An if yu forget it's thare an lik yorself, it taystes like yor likkin the flor. An if yu need to kno how I kno that, yoov never dropt all yor choklit moosse on the flor.

Dorothy did mayke it to London wiv Arnty Anna an her clan, an so they all went to the Syence Mewseum together. Bob sez he got sum fotoes but I think they will be mostly ov Dorothy. Yung luv, eh? Teehee.....

See yu arownd!

Grayum Bear (BSC)

A kwik hullo!

Weekend's scores:

• Gills: yes- we playd Charlton Athletic (full nayme: Charlton Pathetic Trayne Spotters Scum) an they wer doin SO pathetikly that we took pity on them an put a goal in FOR them. Hence, dew to our gerossity, it was a not-a-looz; 1-1
  
• Simpsons:yes
• Tesco: no
  
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 8 /10
• Overall Score: 7.84265/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

I'm akchewlly at Granny's howse RITE NOW!!! It's troo. We bort a littol gadget calld a Dongol (wich I thort waz rood but apparently not) an it meens we can go online enyware.

Weer goin to hav fish an chips for lunch in a minit an then weer goin home cos weev been heer awl weekend. Mummy is enjoyin extendid time wiv the cats an Daddy is jus glad to hav a week off werk for harf-term brayke.

Now I hav sum exsytin news- do yu remember Dorothy, the travellin bear? She coms from Kansas an is travellin rownd the werld wiv a diary, collektin fotoes an lernin stuff. She stayd wiv Julie, an then wiv ME, erlier this summer. WELL GESS WAT???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hav jus fownd owt that she is stayin wiv my Arnty Anna in Ireland, now!!!! AND! AN AN AN AN!!!! ARNTY ANNA IS COMING TO LONDON ON WENDZDAY AN WE AR GOIN TO SEE HER SO I MITE GET TO SEE DOROTHY AGEN!!!!!!!!!!!! Wa-heyy!!!!!!!! Oh boy! I never thort I wud see her agen, not ever! WOW!!!! Hehe!

Well till we get home agen, that's all for now, folks. To be onnist, my beads ar so eggsytid I'm not shor I cud rite mutch mor rite now enyway.