Skwirrols

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: no
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: no
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 9.5/10
• Day Score: 8/10
  
  
  

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Dit was another warm day yesterday (what's happened to autumn? Did dey ferget it?) so mummy went into town an fed der skwirrols in der park.

a Not-A-Bear ov skwirrol type genus >

I've notist dat mummy seems to like a lot ov Not-A-Bears, espeshally der stoopid wuns. Take deez skwirrols fer instance. She givs dem two hazelnuts at a time. Sheez been doing this all summer. Dey eat wun, den run off and bury der uver wun in the flower-pots round der band-stand. Den dey run bak fer more. Now, not all deez skwirrols are dis year's batch, so they must hav dun this larst year, an der year befor, too. So how come they don't realize dat der counsil will com and empty all der flower pots an tayk dem away at der end ov der summer? About 70% ov wot dey have skwirroled away fer der winter iz going to be nicked by der counsil workmen eny day now. An der magpies yewsually nick der rest. See? Not the sharpest pointy stick in der forrest, are dey?

Dits like granny liking English Bull Terriers cos deyer ugly an she sez she feels sorry fer dem. (Maybe I hav uncuvered der reeson wy my parents adoptid my little sister.)

Enyway, mummy ended up wiv muddy skwirrol foot prints all over her cos wun partikularly gluttonous wun kept climbing up her fer mor hazelnuts. Now if I did that wen she got der choklit peanuts out I'd be told off, but not der skwirrols, oh no, she thort dat was cute! Dit's species-ist, I tell yu.

Bye fer now!