WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Sayings. (Or "lies")

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: no
  • Simpsons: yes
  • Tesco: no- suspect mum went to that hideous "Saynsburys" yuk!
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10/10 (I'm so good at this)
  • Day Score: 7/10
HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

It is about time I brort to your attenshun sumthing about grown-up hewman not-a-bears. They LIE.

Now, if I tell a lie - not that I do, but if I did- I'd be told off and probly be mayde to do sumthing hewmiliating like, be nice to my sister or sumthing. But when hewman-grown-ups tell lies they get away with it.

For example, if sumthing goes wrong, they say it's Sod's law. Well I wantid to know who this Sod was. He is responsibol for a lot of bad stuff, like, running out of chiken wen mum was making chiken curry, or getting a lec-trissity cut wen I needid to send an important e-mail on essenshol spy bizzness (carn't say mor). AND, worst of all, he was responsibol for daddy's Hobnob breaking in half an falling into his tea wen he dunkt it!

Well I wantid to know who the blighter was, so I cud give him a gud one-two up the jacksy. But yu know wat? He duzzent exist! They've been blaming evrything on sumwun who duzzent even exist.

now just stop it!

There are lots of other exampols of grown-up lies. Like, wen sumwun on the news said he was sitting on the fence. I lookt up, an he was no where near a fence. He wassent even outside! I arskt daddy about it, and he said, "Oh Bob, it's just a SAYING!". Yu see? MOR LIES!

They do this all the time. Yu watch out, lissen to yor grown-up-hewmans today, an see how menny times yu catch them telling lies- an then telling yu "it's a saying". Tsk!

Bye fer now!

5 comments:

Margaret said...

Oh Bob, you poor Bear! Have they explained about metaphor now?

B.T.Bear Esq. said...

Wat?

Matt said...

Does this mean that a bear with a sore head is always a bear with a sore head?

Spaulding T, and Teddy T. Bear said...

Wait a minute?! Are you trying to tell us that those sounds (that certainly sound like they're coming from Mommy and Daddy, and actually have a nasty odor to them) AREN'T ducks under the floor? Are you trying to tell us that those sounds would come, whehther we pulled their fingers or not? (And bears, not having fingers, cannot make those sounds.) Are you trying to s'plain to us that when hew-mans say something "went over our heads," nothing has?! We've been searching all over for ducks under the floor and stuff flying over our heads, but have never found them!

Next thing you know, we'll find out there is no Murphy to have a Law for either! Wait?! If there is no Murphy's Law, then why does it always rain right after we get all our chores done, so we can go out to play?!

We don't know, who Dod is, but we suspect his name is Murphy in Abearica!

Confurrsedily Yours,
Teddy T. and Spaulding T.
who are now afraid that Matt might be right, and these deep thoughts will keep bears with sore heads!

B.T.Bear Esq. said...

YEs, Teddy & Spaulding, they've been lying to us all along! It's really disgusting!

I don't know how they get away with it.

It's certainly given me a sore head, thinking about it.

Yes, I think our Mr Sod might be related to your Mr Murphy...