Pantless At Tesco!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: Hibernayting
• Simpsons: no; at Tesco
• Tesco: oh, YES!
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 9.5/10
• Day Score: 8.37/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Weer off to Granny's fer the weekend, but I jus HAD to pop in an tell yu wat happened larst nite.

HAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Me an Mummy walked to Tesco an got the shopping. Wen we reeched the till to pay we rang Daddy to arsk him to come an get us cos it was too hevy to carry. He took a while to arrive but wen he did, he sneakt up to me (I ride in the trolley) an whispered in my ear:

"BOB! You'll never gess! The elastic on me' pants has jus gone!"

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Mummy, being nosey, demarnded to know why The Bear had just creased up an dived in among the packs of sultanas she'd bort fer the berds, shaking. He must hav told her, cos I herd her say,

"OH FER GOODNESS' SAKE!"

An we shuffled off to the carpark. Daddy had a VERY Visible Panty Line. About half way between his hips an his knees. The crotch of his trousers was showing signs of strain an we jus hoped the button an flies wud hold out.

He explained to me that "It happened as I got out of the car. I wassent worreed at ferst cos I thort there'd be enuff skin frikshun to keep them on me buttocks."

But alas, no. Down they fled, leaving Daddy skuttling through Tescos looking fer us, poised like a drunk hoo'd pooed his pants.

Well, I nearly burst my bum, I larfed so much. I cuddent navigate home cos I cuddent sit upright. So we drove blind.

Wen we got home he ran upstairs in slow-motion an got changed. He brort the pants downstairs, they wer the faithful old wuns that we cuddent quite remember the colour of- were they brown or wer they maroon? Alas, their intended colour was long ago lost in the mists of time. Mummy opened the bin, I saluted, an he dropt them in.

Weird Old Marroony Pants, R.I.P.

Bye fer now!