- Gills: hibernaytin
- Simpsons: yes
- Tesco: no: an she bort veggies from sumware ELSE
- Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10: lept out to get Mummy an mayde her jump befor I even reacht her nose. /10
- Day Score: 7.6324/10
Dilly sez boys ar all disgustin. But gerls do disgustin too. I've been waitin fer proof of this fer a long time, an larst nite, Mummy obliged.She went outside to put the rubbish out for the Bin-Man. (Wun of the less-ritten-about super-heroes, probly cos he duzzent wear a cape.)
A few things seemd to slip Mummy's mind wen she did this.The ferst was that the gardin slugs come out at nite.
The second was shoes.I had gon to bed wiv Daddy alreddy an was jus findin my page in The Grayte Bedtime Book Of Bear Storeez, wen I spottid her hoppin up the stairs holdin wun foot ahed of her an wrinklin her nose up goin "URGHRGHRGHRGHRGH!"
Hav yu ever seen a big, fat, blak slug skwisht between sumwun's toes? I can tell yu, ther is ownly wun thing mor gross, an that is the realisation that "this is goin to take a scrubbin-brush".Now, yu may think, "Ah! But that duzzent mayke gerls disgustin, cos that waz ownly an accident, not like wen yu cleen yer ears wiv yor toenail clippings an then eet them, or the time wen Daddy waz doin the Readin at Church an seecretly gobbed on his hand an hid it behind the lectern."
Well, my dear Bears an Not-A-Bears, if havin skwisht slug between yer toes issent disgustin, how about her explanayshun?-
"I thort, wen I got out ther, that I shud hav shoes on. But I thort the
blak things on the grownd wer just bits of hedgehog poo."
OH! WELL! THAT wud be OK between yer toes, of course!
Bye fer now!