WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Grayum sayves the day

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: yes - we won!!! 1 - 0 to Brighton (full nayme: Bry-ton-ov-poo-town)
  • Simpsons: no
  • Tesco: yes! Fer noospayper an cow-jooss
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10! /10
  • Day Score: wa-heyyy! 8.56312/10

We won! Wa-heyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!! So thank yu to all members ov the Don't Mok The Bear Club fer warin yor bloo stuff yestaday. It werkt!

All waz not totally grayte, tho, as we dident get to the gayme. AND we dident get to Granny's, wich means Grayum is stayin thare fer ANOTHER week.

Enyway. This is wat happend:

Me an Daddy left Colchester 2 hours befor the match in Gillingham, so we shud hav got thare wiv lots ov time to park the car an get sum tea an a pie. But alas, all waz not grayte on the motorway.

To get from this cownty (Essex) to Granny's cownty (Kent) yu hav to cross this big bridge:

but we cuddent cross the bridge cos thare waz too much traffik. Yu hav to pay £1 to go over the bridge, an sum ov the masheens that yu pay wernt werkin. So evrywun kewd behind the wuns that were, but that wassent menny. So thare waz a big traffic jam. An we wer neer the bak ov it.

Daddy startid yewsin lots ov new werds wile we sat waytin. Heer ar sum ov them:

"******* ****"
"******* ****"
"****** ****"
"*** **"
"****** *** **"
"******* ******* *** **"
"*** *******"
"*** ******* *** ** * *****"
"*** ******* ****"
"*** ******* ******* ****"
"******* ******* **** **** ****"
"******* ***"

it hert my eers!

Just as well Mummy wassent in the car. She had stayd behind becos she had tummy ayche. I had grayte simpothy wiv her as I had bad eer ayche arfter a wile.

Soon it waz ovious that we wernt goin to get to the match so we lissend on the radio to keep trak ov the scor. It waz 0 - 0 fer aiges.

So I rang Grayum up at Granny's howse an sed,

"GRAYUM! Yoov got to get on a trayne an get to the match! Yu hav to tutch the ball!" cos larst time we wun I waz shor it waz cos I had tutcht the ball an parst on all the luk from yu lot wearin yor best bloo pants.

Lukily Grayum iz good at bein a stoaway an got the next bus, in Granny's bag. He jus got the trayne in time, an then rode cars all the way from the stayshun to the football match, ware he was small enuff to slip in under the gayte wivowt payin (wa-heyyy!) he got thare neer the end -I thort we wer dun for, but then wiv jus 7 minits to go, he ran owt an rubbd his nose on the ball, showtid "Not-a-bear!" an hid behind the goal -an then we scord!!!!!! An evrywun cheerd!!! An Grayum thort they wer all cheerin fer him, so he did a lap ov onnor. Unfortewnitly he ownly haz littol legs, so he haddent kwite finisht it befor the end ov the gayme.

Pity we never mayde it to Granny's. We had to tern bak an come home agen in the end. But Grayum rang in the eevnin to say heed got bak to Granny's all rite. Then, to sellybrate, we ate the carrot cayke that we had been goin to giv to Granny. Arfter all, it wud be parst its best by the time we get thare next weekend. Ha! Meenwile Grayum had sum choklit biskits that Granny had got in fer us, so it all werkt owt ok in the end.

Bye fer now!


Phytheas said...

Hehehehe you beat "Bry-ton-ov-poo-town"! If I were a footballist I suppose I'd have to support them as they're just down the road. Being a rugbyist I'm still moaning about the nil points on Friday. Don't rabbits eat carrot cake, not Bears?


Pope Terry said...

Sounds quite lucky old Grayum could make it. Good idea with the cake though it would be a shame to have it go to waste.

CHEWY said...

Cheers to Grayum!

That bridge looks very high up. I wouldn't want to get stuck on it.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Oh deer, I dident kno yu livd so close to Bryton!
Yes, Mummy waz disappoyntid that Ingerland dident get a singol poynt the other day. Sge sed they wer playin in their sleep.
I serport Oirland on accownt ov my nose. They won their gayme, but not very well. Maybe they'd eeten too menny biskits befor the gayme. Hav yu been in a shop calld Past Times? They sell Guinness flayver choklit! Wa-heyy! I rekkon that's wat the Oirish teem had been feestin on.


B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Pope Terry,

The carrot cayke waz yummy; it had lots ov walnutty bits in it.

Yes, good ol Grayum. He definitly haz his yewsis.



B.T.Bear (esq.) said...


Yes it's very hi, that bridge. But I like it better than the tunnel. Yu tayke the bridge there an the tunnel bak, cos they eech ownly go wun way. Dilly prefers the tunnel cos she sez she likes burrowin. Straynge that, fer sumwun hoo duzzent like the dark.


Helena said...

Oh Bob,

I'm so sorry to hear that Daddy hurt your ears with his swearing. I shall have words with him about using bad language in front of the little ones.


B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Mummy! Go away, yor embarrassin me.

Frog said...

I hope your ears are ok by now...

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

they had a bit ov a rest, then Daddy put sum flat-pak fernicher together. Ouch...