- Gills: no
- Simpsons: yes
- Tesco: yes, layte nite ride fer petrol. I kwite like the layte-nite trips. They're eggsytin.
- Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 9.5/10
- Day Score: 7.45896/10
If yu ar a skoller ov Mr Winnie T Pooh (ooh! Look at that! He haz the sayme middol nayme as me. I wunder if weer relaytid...) yu will hav herd ov Bear Hums. Mr Pooh tendid to veer towards Hums that endid in things like "Tiddly-pom". Hence:
The mor it snows tiddly pom
The mor cold my toes tiddly pom
This construkshun is a handy way ov coverin up things. Offen it covers up seekrit thorts, an espeshly seekrit thinkin. Like, wen yu don't want peepol to kno yor thinkin, let alone WAT yor thinkin. Heers another exampol, strate owt ov that epic, The House At Pooh Corner:
An untraynd eevsdropper mite be led to think that this is the mutterins ov a nutter. AHA! Yu see? So if he wer a sooper-spy wiv an IQ like that skweeky bloke that goze rownd in a chare rytin books abowt the yewniverse, yood never serspekt it, wood yu? So ther yu ar, yu see. Ther is mor to a Bear Hum than meets the eer.I prefer the mor modern classiks, bein as I am a modern, up-to-the-minit cosmo Bear. Wun ov my fayvrits is
Laaaaaaaaaaa-laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-laaaaaaaaaaa-la-la-la-laaaaaaaaaaaWich can be repeetid ad-in-fin-eye-tum. An offen is. Wun eevnin I was doin such intense seekrit thinkin that our naybers bangd on the wall.
Ware ar yor Bears now? Probly on the bed, or watchin telly, or sniffin owt a fresh pot plarnt. (Or, oviossly, in the pant dror, but that wud meen they're havin a well-ernd brayke from Deep Thinkin, an duzzent cownt.) Tip-toe over to ware they ar now, an see if yu can detekt a Hum. But don't interrupt: it cud well meen that they ar considerin wat to get yu fer Crismoss.Bye fer now!