WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Hogwatchin

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: no
  • Simpsons: yes
  • Tesco: no, an Mummy got food from M & S wen she waz in town. M & S is ok for pants, in fakt, thare pants ar pritty good frolickin mateerial. But thare's no exkewse for gettin food thare. Not wen yu hav a loyalty card for Tesco. Sum peepol don't kno wat loyalty is. I do. I'm a Bear. Hewmans ar fikkol.
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 9/10
  • Day Score: 7 an a bit./10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Do yu remember, in the ortum, we put a hedgehog hybernayshun box in the garden? Well, our hedgehog, or hedgermahogin, as Mummy calls them (porze for sye) haz emerged from his hideaway.

But he issent very brayve, as hedgehogs go. Heer ar sum fotoes I cort ov him the uther nite.

He had just come owt ob his howse, an waz just abowt to tuk in to the supper Mummy had put owt for him, wen anuther, bigger, hog appeerd! I don't kno whare he cayme from cos I wassent lookin that way. He must hav rayced across the lawn top speed!!!Well our littol wun just froze an tryd to tuk his snowt in to mayke himself smaller. He jus let the bigger hog eet all his stuff!!!Heer he is panickin an sayin, ooo, ooo, ar yu goin to leev me ENY????Por wee thing moovd a wee bit now an then just to sniff the dissappeerin food, but he let the big hog eet it all..
Then he must hav thort, "Oh no! He stole my supper! Wat if he wants my howse too?" an so he ran bak into his howse. The uther wun followd but ours mayde grunty noizes the big wun went away agen.

This is how scaredy our hog was- look at this foto an yu can see a damp spot whare ours sat an watched the big hog eet his food! It issent wee, it's sweat, from whare he was affeard!!
Mummy put owt mor food for him an vencherly, arfter an hour or so, he poppt owt agen an ate it. But now this seems ot be all he duz- he comes owt at nite, eets, then goze bak in his howse. This issent wat hogs shud be doin! He shud be owt an abowt, forragin an explorin an bein a hog.

Mummy thinks he is wun ov larst yeer's baybys an he duzzent reelly kno wat to do yet. In fakt, she rekkons, he duzzent eevn kno heez a hog. This is wy he waz scared ov that straynge big spikey monster that nite.

I've been talkin to him wen he comes owt an tellin him, I'm a Bear, an Bears ar brayve. If yu just imagin yor a Bear, that will help yu be brayve. (Helps for Mummy wen she goze to the dentist.)

Daddy jus sez, "Trust us to get the darft wun!"

Not shor wat he meens by that.

Bye fer now!

16 comments:

chewy said...

What kinds of food did you put out?
Do they eat what cats eat? We have opossums in my neighborhood and they eat the same foods as cats eat.
We also get gray squirrels, skunks, raccoons and one time a little bunny.

Julie said...

Poor hedgmahogin! He needs some hedgmahogin lessuns!

Joe Stains said...

woah your very own pet hedgehog?! Sorry he seems to be a doofus, but I have one of those at my house and he has his moments. Maybe your hedgy will wise up soon.

Anonymous said...

You can buy 'Spike's Dinner' in the UK. Not sure if they still do it in tins (rather like cat food) but they sure do a dried version which is much easier...until it rains and goes all mushy! Our hedgies have run away lately but we used to have them - and rescued quite a few babies at times. Including one snuggled up on the bristly doormat when its Mum had hibernated!! Lucky you Bob!!! PS, the Watership Down Bears are out of disgrace and my pants drawer is tied shut!! Di xx

CherryPie said...

Aww! poor little thing.

i beati said...

pretty good size I forgot that good eaters name. My cat is being operated on Monday and doggie very sick

Stardust said...

Bob!! Nose hugs...

Thanks fer yur greeting, very nice from a beary sweet Bear.

Now the lil hog iz too pitiful to watch!! I'm glad dat it still got yur family to have him. Let's hope dat he soon be big an hoggy. But arn't yu sad if he's big enuf and decides to leeve?

Shayme on de bigger fella. Tsk.

Alex L said...

I'm sure he'll get it one day, hedgehogging can't be that hard... can it?

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Chewy,

We giv him corned beef, wich is like slices ov ham, sept it is mayde ov beef an very crumbly. He luvs it. Mummy mixes it up wiv oats an warter, so it is like a meaty porridge. Then she sprinkles in sum berd seed. She duzz that cos she cort a hedgehog eetin the berd seed wun nite. Befor that, she dident kno they ate it!

We see grey skwirrols too, but ownly twice in our garden. I like bunnys. Mummy likes raccoons but we don't get them in Yurrop. She likes the skunk on that cartoon tho, Pepe Le Pew.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Julie!

Yes he needs a hedgermahogin Mummy, or a big bruther to carfter him!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Joe Stains,

No, he issent a pet, we jus put a hut in the garden for him to hibernayte in. Heez wile, wich is just as well cos they hav fleas. HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Hullo Anonymous Di! Hehehe! We hav now bort sum ov the Spike's Dinner an he is eetin it ok. It hassent rayned on it yet, so I don't kno if he will eet it wet. We all thort it was cewt abowt yor bayby wun huggin the dormat. We told Granny abowt that wun an she went all awwwwww.....
:@}

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Cherrypie,

He is a bit pathetic issent he? But we ar keepin an eye on him :@}

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

i beati,

Mr Scooter issent well either. I was very sorry to reed abowt yor por doggy today. Sendin nose hugs...

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Stardust,

I don't think he wud compleetly leev. We get abowt 4 or 5 vizitin eech nite. They all wal abowt a mile at nite to look for food, so eevn if he wanders off, he will probly pop bak for his supper on his walk!!!

:@}

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Alex L,

I'm not shor, I don't think they hav very big braynes. I've eevn seen them walk throo their food to get to a warter bowl, then walk throo the warter to carry on walkin off. Not very brite, that. D'oh!