WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".

Friday, October 07, 2011

That was close!!!!!!

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: No
  • Simpsons: No
  • Tesco: Yes, a mercy run for Mummy's emergency choklit.
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 9.5 /10
  • Overall Score: 7.2868/10
HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!!!

Do yu remember the Pant Alien? Calamity Jane cayme across him a few yeers ago, an sent to him to us. Arfter sum panik an sum emergency pant-alien-trap manufacture, he settold down to life in the pant dror, popping owt on Wendzdays for the occayshunal cheez an pikkol sandwich.

WELL!! Today I cort him owt ov the dror, an mischiffing, an it cud hav bin reelly seerius!!!!!


HEY YU!! WAT AR YU UP TO??

WAT THE?

WARE DID HE GO??


THARE HE GOZE! AN HEEZ GOT MY INVISIBILITY PANTS!!!

OI!!!!!!!!!!
BAK IN THE PANT DROR, WIV YU!

PHEW! THAT WAZ CLOSE!
Theez arnt jus eny pant, yu see.
To yor untrayned eye they may seem to be an aynchent Crismoss relik, wat wiv the Rudolf motif, but aha! Theez ar my speshol Invisibility Pants,
for mishuns of speshol, diverse infincibility an cunning!

WATCH! I SHALL DEMONSTRAYTE!
They don't werk till they ar rite on top ov yor hed....

an...... TA-DAR!!!!!!

....an NOW I'M BAK!
HEHEHE! So now yu see how bad it wud be if theez fell into the rong paws or hands. Or talons. Let's just say feet.

Hav yu got eny invisibility pants?
Ov corse, unless yu've akchewly tryd a pair ov Crismoss pants on yor hed, yor not likely to noe, ar yu.....

22 comments:

Buttons the Bear said...

Hey Bob,
Glad you got your special pants back.
Disasters must be avoided at all cost.

Are you feeling alright? Mom thought you looked a bit tired around the eyes in that last photo. She would notice that, as it is what she see when she looks at herself in mirror these days.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

I'm ok, Buttons dood, I just havent trimmd my eyelashes this munth yet. Gerls do fuss don't they?

Jerry and Ben said...

Hi Bob, we're so glad that you saw that Pant Alien! We haven't lost any pants recently, but Papa sometimes has a hard time finding his car keys. Does that Alien maybe steal car keys too? We'll keep our eyes out for him!

Julie said...

Those invizibillity pantz are ace! They make you blend right in with that beeootiful cover on the bed. How good is that?!

cv/d said...

lol. I came across this blog via Blogger's "next" button. I think it's hilarious.

Although, I have some questions:
1)What's the point to it?
2)Is there a hidden message/theme?
(a)Is it satirical?
(b)Am I missing a joke, perhaps?
(i) or is it an inside joke?
3)Why a bear?

I hope you can enlighten me! :)

Two French Bulldogs said...

we're going to have to try that
Benny & Lily

Di said...

Hi Bob - long time since you blogged. Great to see you back, do the invisibility pants work on humans? Len has some Christmas ones and if I find them I could try - might get me out of doing the cooking :) And, I also love that beautiful bedspread - your Mum has taste!! Big hugs, Di xx

Beanie Mouse said...

WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT'S THE POINT OF THIS BLOG???!!! This is BOB's BLOG all about his life and Times!!!! Bob's a Bear because he couldn't be anyone else, could he?! And I'm very envious of your invisibility pants - I want a pair now!!!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Jerry an Ben,

I don't think the Pant Alien takes keys as well, unless they ar the keys to a pant dror. Mind yu my Daddy is always loozing his keys too. I think it mite just be a Daddy thing. Thare ar putters an thare ar lefters in life, Bears, an Daddys ar definitely lefters. This means thare stuff is ware they left it. An that cud be enyware. Putters noe ware stuff is put. But lefters just leev it evryware. I'm lukky cos my Mummy livs wiv me so wen I leev stuff, she puts it sumware. But Daddy's Mummy duzzent liv wiv him. She duzzent eevn liv in the same country. Perhaps she got fed up putting his ties away wen he leevs them playces.

Jhee jhee jhee!!!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Julie,

I note that I can see yu under that hat, so it issent an invisibility hat. I just thort I'd menshun it in cayse yu thort it was werking.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Florida Butch,

Whaaa????

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Benny an Lily,

be shor that yor ears ar well tukt in wen yu try it. Eny emergent ear material will stop the pants werking!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Di,

Oh yes they werk on hewmans, too.
Let me noe how yu get on!

That bedspred- Mummy bort it at an art an craft fair on Orgust bank hollyday. The laydy arskt for £15. Mummy dident haggle cos she liket it so mutch an enyway, she sed she thort the laydy had sed 50, so wen she realized it was 15 that waz a reel bargain all over agen!!!

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Beanie,

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh Beanie, I dident noe how to do an arnser for that wun an yu sayved me!

Angel Ginger Jasper said...

Wow they are realy cool we could all do with some of those to make us invisible to the beans sometimes. Sorry not been around but I had blog issues a while back and lost my blog roll. I am adding to google reader when I find friends again. I added you now.. Hugs GJ xx

cv/d said...

Oh. :) Well, I'm sorry for not having been clear enough, Mr. Bear. Do you think your mom would mind if I ask her those questions on her personal blog?

CherryPie said...

That was a close escape. How fun to have some invisibility pants :-)

Asta said...

Bob
What a close call..thank dog you found him in time and got him back to his dwawew..what a cunning alien, I think you'll maybe have to put one of those leg bwacelets on him that notifies you in case he makes an escape again and plots mischeef.
I have no speshol invisibull pants that I know of, but will test them all out
smoochie kisses
ASTA

Beanie Mouse said...

That's OK Bob!! I don't think FLorida realises that you're a Serious Bear On A Spy Mishun!!!

BumbleVee said...

hey Bob....I don't even need pants. I'm almost invisible most of the time...and if I don't put on any mascara?...(my eyelashes are totally white) or bother to brush my hair?...well...nobody notices me AT all... it's perfect for doing any undercover operations let me tell you. They won't recognize me next time they see me...well, that is.... if I make an attempt at beautifying..... cuz with some prettier eyes....and maybe some earrings and lipstick....hah....they'll not know at all who I am. But, maybe instead of lamenting about not being seen...I should be happy they don't see me..hahahhah.. better they don't if I am undercover anyway...

Feronia said...

Wow! That *was* close, Bob. I wish I had some invisibility pants!

The Teddy Bear Family said...

Mom has been helping us write our famous novel (the one she's been promising to help us with for EIGHT long years) finally. We have the first draft done, but we have a small problem you might be able to help us with.

It's a minor part, but a dangerous part. There's this stuffed animal we don't know, who gets his arm torn off. (Don't panic. It's pretend and our wives and daughters are excellent seamstressesses, even if Mommy isn't. He'll be fixed good as new.) Well, there's a whole lot of stuffed animals and even a few dolls in our story, so we were running out of types of stuffed animals. We don't need The Pants Alien literally, but can we use him for that part of our story? He's got just the right look. The right arms and legs.

We'd include you in the story, too, but this is strictly an Abearican Tale. (That's a good thing for you, given the story is about our lawmakers making toys illegal, thus leaving stuffed animals and dolls fending for ourselves.) So, can we use the Pant Alien in our soon-to-be-and-even-better-than-Harry-Potter story? It's gonna be the first in a series of stories about us.